The Oral: Working With Tongue

Hi, folks. This is Yash again. I am 23 and live in Pune. My email id is [email protected]. Please mail your feedback. For chit chat ping me on hangouts. I am a horny guy, so any girl or aunty can contact me. I especially love divorced aunties. I have had very good experiences with them. I am a software engineer by profession. I have a lot of interest and experience in sex. I have been doing sex since I was 18. I also read a lot about sex in my free time. As a result, I have gathered a lot of knowledge about sex, what to do, what not to and how to do everything well. So, I am starting an informative series on Indian Sex Stories. It will have many parts and I will publish them at regular intervals. Don’t worry, it will not be boring, save the story and read it when you are going to have sex. Knowing about proper sex can really improve your sex life. Let’s start with oral sex. How to give a girl oral sex.

Oral sex is up there with life’s greatest pleasures. The secret to making it really good is simple—you have to enjoy both the giving and receiving. Let’s start with the basics:

It’s a treat, not a chore. Treat oral sex like it’s a huge favor and the experience will be awful, no matter how practiced your tongue techniques. Giving your partner pleasure should be almost as fulfilling for you as for them. The best oral sessions are offered enthusiastically, not asked for and delivered begrudgingly.

Ignore what they do in porn films. It’s totally misleading. In porn movies, they pull back when he’s giving her oral so you can see what’s going on. In real life, you can’t normally see what’s happening because his face is pressed against you, and it feels better like that. And in porn movies girls deep-throat everyone—you don’t have to in real life, and guys suck hard on clitorises, pulling them out like they’re made of chewing gum. Do that in real life and you’ll never see her genitals up close and personal again (or her, for that matter).

Give each other guidance. I think a good “let’s learn about each other” session works well about the fifth or sixth time you’ve slept together because you’ve got over that initial shyness. Start by talking about what you like, then demonstrate. He can suck her finger to show what he likes, she can lick his palm to do the same. Then try it out on your actual bits. Do it with the lights on or in daylight—he, especially, needs to see what he’s doing. Instruct, don’t order, and be tactful. “That feels great,” or “I liked the other way better,” works better than, “Stop now. I hate it.”

It’s about connection. Everyone is individual and to be the best your partner ever had, you’ve got to be constantly on the alert for their reaction to whatever you’re trying. It’s good to use different techniques but the main aim is to give that particular person pleasure. Timing is crucial as well.

It’s got to be reciprocal. I’m not saying you both have to do each other in the same session but I am saying it should even up over time. If your partner wants you to do it to them but won’t ever reciprocate, refuse. It’s selfish, unfair, and totally unacceptable.

Giving her oral Pick your position

She takes ages. Try her seated, slouched forward in a chair, or sitting on the kitchen worktop. Get her to slide forward, so her crotch is on the edge of the chair or surface. Put pillows under your knees for comfort and to get the height right. This makes it easier on your neck, means you can use your fingers, and see exactly what you’re doing. Get her to put her feet on your shoulders or something else close by (though preferably not the dinner you’ve just cooked).

She’s fussy or you’re unsure what she really wants. Get her to straddle your face. You’re lying on your back, she then climbs on board, facing in both direction (depending on whether you’re a breast or bottom man!) and balances by putting her hands on the wall or bedhead. She’s got control over everything in this position because she can lift or lower to position herself just so. There’s something fabulously filthy about it as well. Put a pillow under your neck and it’s quite relaxed, though some guys feel a bit suffocated in this position. If she crouches too low, it can be the female equivalent of you pushing the back of her head.

She’s self-conscious. Stick to the traditional pose of her lying on her back, while you lie between her legs. It’s relaxing for her, she doesn’t feel exposed, and she can do whatever it takes to get there—concentrate/ fantasize/recite the alphabet. To make things comfy, put a pillow under her ass and one under your chest.

She’s begging for it. She stands, you kneel in front of her. This is perfect for urgent sex plus it appeals to alpha females who like seeing you shamelessly submissive in front of them. If she goes weak at the knees, literally, and can’t stand any longer—or can’t orgasm standing up (some can’t)—get her to lean against a wall or pull her to the floor to continue. Another good position for confident girls: get her on all fours on the bed, then simply slide in underneath, putting your head on pillows so you can reach.

Take her to heaven

Don’t just rip her panties off and bury your face. Instead, lick through her panties. Long, wet, teasing licks. Then push them to one side, get really close— and simply breathe on her for a second or two, followed by one single, deliciously debilitating lick. Tease further by pushing them back into place and continuing to lick through the fabric. – Peel her knickers off totally and take a moment to just look at her. Look back at her face, say “God, you’re gorgeous,” and then kiss your way down from her tummy to her thighs.

Assuming you’ve done lots of finger foreplay she should be open. If her labia lips are closed, use your nose to do the job. It also lets her know you aren’t put off by her smell or secretions.

Consciously relax your tongue, and your neck and facial muscles. It will stop you getting stiff and will feel better her end. Don’t tense your tongue and make it pointy, relax it so it’s wide and soft and can cover a larger area.

Make sure you’ve got plenty of saliva in your mouth so your tongue’s slippery rather than sandpapery, then lay it flat in between the lips of her labia, swishing it ever-so-gently to provide soft but pulsating pressure. The whole of your mouth will be against her (remember what I said about forgetting what you’ve seen in the porn movies?).

Be constantly aware of her body language. If she lets out a little cry when you first stimulate her clitoris, it’s not necessarily a good sign. It can be a cry of pain. What’s your tongue doing? Really strong licking with a tensed tongue feels bloody awful. Some women like their clitoris sucked, like they do in porn movies, but most hate it! Give it up and try a gentler technique.

While the clitoris is definitely the star of the show, don’t focus exclusively on it, to begin with. Try stiffening your tongue and pushing it inside her like a pretend penis or swirling it in circles just a little way in (most of the nerves are in the first inch anyway). Take a break to move up and lick her breasts, biting her neck, stroke and lick her thighs, the area between her anus and vagina, or try rimming (licking around her anus). Then get back to work on the little man in the boat, trying any or all of the following: long licks with the flat of your tongue, a fluttering side-to-side motion, circles, and zig-zags. Mix it up by using combinations of fast, slow, soft, and firmer (note I said “firmer” not hard) techniques.

Lick, don’t flick. You’ll probably find she likes licking more than flicking. “I hate it when they flick it” was one of the most common responses I got when asking girls which oral techniques they did and didn’t like.

A really simple way to find her hottest spot is to trace a figure-eight with your tongue or lick all the letters of the alphabet (lower case is better because the letters are curlier). Both techniques stop any one part of the clitoris from being overstimulated. It’s also great tongue-training. Practice on your palm—bet your tongue hurts before you get to mmmmm.

Just like with intercourse, most women end up settling on two or three favorite strokes, with one as the guaranteed-to-get-me-there. The time to find this out is at the beginning, change techniques as she’s about to come and she’ll never, ever (ever) forgive you.

When you know her favorite place to be licked, tease her in another session by going close to it but not quite there. Occasionally move your tongue to where she wants it. It’s cruel—and she’ll get annoyed if you do it too long—but also hot as hell if you want to get her to begging point. (Or want to get out of doing the dishes.)

Starting to wonder if it’s ever going to happen … and it’s only been five minutes? Dear, oh dear, did they teach you nothing in school? (Sorry, I forgot—they don’t! Most countries have an appalling sex education system.) It’s probably going to take a lot longer than that, my lovely, so settle in. While you might take an average of four minutes to orgasm, she can do the same if she’s super turned-on but might also take up to 15–20 minutes. Help her get there faster by …

Adding fingers. Either thrust your fingers inside her or make a “V” with your index and middle finger and slide them back and forth with the clitoris in between, as you continue licking. Or get her to put her fingers inside herself while you lick. Reach up and squeeze her breasts.

Resist the urge to go faster in an attempt to get her to orgasm quicker. If anything, slow down. The gentler and slower and more consistent you are, the quicker she’ll get there. (Though it’s not a race to get to the finish line even if that is where the “intercourse” flag tantalizingly waves.)

If she’s not even close but you’re so tired you’re losing the will to live, do one of two things. Either reach down and grab the small vibe you’ve put beside the bed for that purpose and hold it close to the clitoris as you continue to lick (or kiss her instead and just let the vibe do its stuff). Or simply ask her if she wants to stop and/or move on to something else.

If she seems close but your attention is wavering and your tongue’s tired, the advice is completely different. I don’t care what it takes but do NOT stop! Imagine you’ll win a million dollars if you just keep going that little bit longer. Imagine you’re having a threesome with Angelina Jolie, Pamela Anderson, and the hot girl you see on the train every morning. Or the hot guy. Do whatever it takes to eke that final little bit more out of that weary, weary tongue. And if you honestly can’t keep moving it, just press it firmly and let her move against you for a few seconds, licking again the second you recover. (Don’t change techniques, go straight back to what you were doing.) Continue throughout her orgasm (perhaps upping the speed and pressure a little just before it) and— crucially—do not stop until she pushes you away. Her orgasm lasts way, way longer than yours does.

Some women love you to immediately penetrate the second it’s over, while they’re still riding the waves.

If you do, you can set off a further set of scrumptious contractions. Others need time to recuperate and want to lie there panting for a bit. The good news is, she won’t do what you do and roll over and go to sleep. Her body doesn’t release the sleep hormone yours does, to get her ready for another round. Most of us can keep going without a recharge. Though chocolate and a glass of bubbly wouldn’t go amiss in the breaks.

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